Friday, September 24, 2010

Each Day a New Start - ACCOUNTABILITY September 24, 2010 290

9/24/2010   EACH  DAY  COUNTS - 

Starting today I will write here daily and face the reality of where I am in this weight fight.  I was going to say "weight GAME" and correced myself in my thinking immediately that THIS IS NOT A GAME!  My life depends on it.  I am morbidly obese and will change that.
    Didn't weigh today because yesterday when I weighed in I was up 7 pounds from the Thursday before.  Some of that had to be fluid retention but I let it throw me.  I deserved a weight gain but not 7 pounds I thought.  Have to change that "reward--Punishment" thinking.  The scale is just a measuring tool to keep me informed.  Last Thursday I weighed 290.  That hurts me to have to write that.  Phew.  Hard to face.  I had been 283 the Thurs. before.  This is changing right now.  Each day I realize our bodies can weigh different from one day and ALSO one minute to the next the what and why we weigh what we do, but I am behind this weight train.  I am the engineer.  Knowing what works alone doesn't do it, it take ACTION.
Br:  Oaatmeal, raisins, Almond Breeze (milk)
Snack:  3 cris;y bars
Lunch"  2 Turkey Hot Dogs. 1 bread, with mustard, 1/2 Cucumber, 8 oz. G2
Snack:  1/2 Orange
Dinner:  Bowl Homemade chicken soup. 1 slice toast
Snack:  Apple

There you have it.  A new approach to DAY ONE!


Thursday, September 16, 2010

Day 9 - Of Restart Counting Calories

After having a lapse (again) of many days, restarting (again) and today is Day 9

Had a 3 pound loss this past week.  Now to hold that and lose another 2 or 4 !    I am determined, as Sean of "The Daily Diary of a Winning Loser" to do this eating regular food.  My choices have to be supreme and tasty and healthy - and controlled.  Am starting down that road.  Have to remember that it takes time.  Loretas Journey Blog points that out again, using the planting seeds and letting them grow, analogy.  You can't keep digging them up to see how they are doing.  It takes time.
    Went out to lunch today to celebate my niece's birthday and her husband's belated birthday, plus mutual friend coming in to visit for a week.  Had a marvelous time and I think I chose well.  Had the lettuce wrap appetizers, a small piece from my nephew's luncheon plate of "sweet chicken plus veggies"and the small little larger than a shot glass dessert, filled with terimasu.  PERFECT  Everyone had s wonderful time.  I don't eat out often, but when I do I intend to do intelligent choosing, to fit my chosen journey map.
     Will be getting a phone with a camera in it tomorrow..  Will be able to learn how and then add pics to my blogs.  I have a lot to learn about this blogging.
      Another day of good choices and encouraging one another!  Fabulous.

Monday, September 6, 2010


WHAT HAPPENED?  I'm still learning about blogging I guess.  Must have pressed a key without knowing it. 
It IS going to be a happy holiday = quiet for me and happy because my ankly stopped hurting.  Thought the pain was from too much walking around unpacking and putting things back ..... but had some shrimp and now wonder if that set off my gout.  Took the meds I have for that and it cleared.  Will be able to get a lot done today.
    All the advice of the experts keep saying NO MORE EXCUSES and WHAT  IS  THE  REASON YOU ARE FAT?  Well, I didn't think I had excuses going for me - but with this ankle thing, which has had a constant small pain in it until today, makes me wonder.  I know I worry about "getting hurt" and making things so bad I have to sit for a week because of the pain.  Am I using my back, my knee and my ankle as excuses?  Hmmm   Today is another FIRST day of changing my lifestyle.  If I had a nickle for all the FIRST DAYS  - you know the rest.   It's going to be a good day - good Monday - good Holiday.
Bye for now....

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Struggle - STRUGGLE - Struggle

September 4, 2010    Saturday    Struggling Never Ends

Don't know why I should be surprised that every time I think NOW I am on a roll and this will just keep going, that I get sidetracked.  Realize having body pains leads me to "throw in the towel" thinking.  My ankle has been giving me awful pain the last two days and today I found it hard to write down the calories of what I ,am eating.  Dr. Drew Pinsky was on a talk show the other day (repeat show) saying "an addict needs ongoing treatment, just like a diabetic.  Needs to be attended to every day or it goes out of control."   I really thought once the underlying roots of the WHY of the behavior was unearthed the behavior would stop.  All the awareness does is gives you a heads up to make a choice, to stop the behavior.  Maybe someday it will become automatic but I don't know.
       Loretta, another blogger, compared the size of the Cessna Airplane to a Boeing Jet and made the metaphor on how much different it is to get the two planes in the air to how different it is for someone who is morbidly obese. to someone who needs to lose 10 or 20 pounds.  Anyone who has not been morbidly obese can't relate to those of us that are.  Even the experts listing rules and methods needed to lose - only list the surface methods. The food part of the diet is only one portion (10%) of success.  The mental and emotional side of the coin are 80%.  We don't only eat because we are hungry! It's a lifetime struggle.
    Good going to all of us that are struggling.